I love Marie Forleo and her work!
I enjoy her Marie TV episodes and weekly newsletter because I get so much encouragement and inspirations from her around being an entrepreneur while being true to yourself.
(Plus I really appreciate her sense of humor :D)
I got this episode of Marie TV in my inbox right before the holidays, and it made me pause.
In this episode of Marie TV, she shares 3 important questions to ask yourself before making your new year’s resolution for 2017.
I’m not much of a New Year’s resolution setter – I’m always working on some sort of goals, and goals change over time. So I don’t feel the need to make a resolution for the year, per se. But I found these questions insightful and thought you might benefit from it, too!
(I highly encourage you to watch the episode first if you want to do this exercise yourself. It’ll resonate more with you!)
OK, here are the 3 questions and my answers:
1. What’s one thing you did that you’re proud of?
I try to recognize small successes every day as it motivates me to keep moving forward – so when I think back on my accomplishments this past year, it’s hard to just choose one!
I had a successful holiday season, my business continues to grow, I made a total of 7 tutorial videos for Sakura of America, and started a daily painting challenge in November…
So, if I had to sum it up, I’m proud of doing something that scares me and pushing myself out of my comfort zone every day!
2. What’s one mistake you made and the lesson you learned?
Again, there are many to choose from… :D, but I’d have to say poor time management.
I know from experience everything takes longer than you think (like 3 x longer). I think I scheduled enough time to complete something but inevitably, it takes longer, or something else comes up that needs my attention so my original tasks get pushed back, which in turn, pushes everything else back.
This happens more often than I want to admit, and I always feel bad about myself when it happens. I get overly optimistic about how much I could get done and tend to pack too much into my day. And when it doesn’t happen, I end up stressing out about it 😦
I would’t feel too terrible if I make this mistake for a new task I’ve never done before, but I keep experiencing this cycle for things I’ve done many times before! (Like creating video tutorials.)
My logic is, well, I’ve done this before. –> I should be more efficient at this by now. –> It shouldn’t take too long. It kinda makes sense, but certain things can’t or shouldn’t be rushed, and I tend to take a long time to make a decision anyway.
So what I’m going to do differently would be to internalize the lesson and change my expectation around how much I can get done within a timeframe! And to identify where I can truly maximize the efficiency and create a process for it so I don’t waste time unnecessarily.
3. What’s one story you’re willing to let go of before the New Year?
This is the most powerful question for me, and my answer is: comparing myself with other artists on the internet and believing everyone else is doing better.
It’s an easy trap to fall into. Internet only shows a small part of our lives, and especially if you’re a working artist, you often only show the polished and highly curated works on social media and highlight our successes (heck, I do that!!).
We don’t share the crappy part of our life very often – maybe your relationships are falling apart, maybe your bank account is almost empty and you don’t know where the next check is coming from, or maybe you got nothing but rejection letters for the first 5 years of your career – and I’m not advocating for airing your dirty laundry on the internet for the sake of just venting. It’s often more appropriate to do so with your close friends and/or your therapist!
But it’s important to remember people’s lives are much more complex than what you see on the surface, and comparing yourself to the strangers on the internet is so damaging! And since when has that helped you reach your goals anyway??? 😀
I fall into this more often when I’m having self-doubt and feeling insecure about my work. And when I catch myself doing that, I try to be kind with myself and acknowledge that’s what’s happening. I try to give myself a moment to just feel those feelings and remind myself it’s ok to not be positive and happy all the time.
Here are a few things I do when I’m browsing the social media so I don’t fall into the comparison trap : 1) don’t pay attention to how many followers or “likes” other artists are getting, or for that matter, for myself, either. It’s a metric that’s good for something but doesn’t validate your worth as a person or an artist. 2) simply enjoy the beautiful work people put out and be curious about what makes their work so inspiring instead of wishing you could draw like them or your life would be so much better if your work looked more like your idol’s. Your creative life is most fulfilling when you stay true to your voice and create what makes you happy! Learn from others, sure, but keep being you 🙂 3) “like” their work and share encouraging comments with other artists! By lifting up others, my jealousy and insecurity usually go away.
And most importantly, I try to bring my focus on what progress I made to reach my goal today. If I did at least one thing to move my business forward, then I call it a success! It doesn’t matter what other people are doing or not doing. You’re the only one who lives 100% of your life, you know??
Hope these questions and answers inspired you! Share your answers in the comment! I’d love to know 🙂